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Learn Portuguese!:

"Nós somos listar indo! Traga seu chapéu verde." We're going streaking! Bring your green hat.

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Graphology is available for preorder.
And Graphology 2 is awaiting your beautiful submissions.

Folks, our e-mail was a little wonky last week, but we think everything's been sorted out. If you've submit something, or just said hello, and have not yet heard a reply, please assume electronic wonkiness is at fault, and not Y.P.R. snubbery, and re-e-mail accordingly. Many thanks.

THE DeVITO CODE "Off the record, on the QT, and very hush-hush." Sid Hudgens, L.A. Confidential "There's nothing you can get from a book that you can't get from a television faster." Harry Wormwood, Matilda "You don't really think you'll win... do you?" Oswald Cobblepot, Batman Returns "There is no winning! Only degrees of losing!" Gavin D'Amato, The War of the Roses "Someone's about to get killed here and you're farting around with prehistoric animals. We've stolen enough of these antique trinkets to keep us living comfortably for the rest of our lives. Let's kiss off this third world toilet." Ralph, Romancing the Stone "You're all I thought about for six months. They threw me in a jail filled with rejects from the communicable disease ward. Every wacko, drippy, open-sored lowlife was in that joint, all of them wanting to hire on as my proctologist." Ralph, again, The Jewel of the Nile "You're gonna be so rich you'll be pissing on hundred dollar bills just to see the look on Franklin's face!" Burke Bennett, Death to Smoochy "Everybody needs money! That's why they call it money!" Mickey Bergman, Heist "Money talks and bullshit walks!" Vincent Benedict, Twins "You remember what a Rainmaker is, kid? The bucks are going to start falling from the sky." Deck Shifflet, The Rainmaker "They pulled the plug on him. He wheezed and shook for about an hour and then... he stabilized. That son-of-a-bitch just got older and sicker, and older and sicker, AND OLDER AND SICKER...!" Sam Stone, Ruthless People "Kill her, Larry." Owen, Throw Momma from the Train "He'll be back... they all come back... the only one who never came back was James Caan... and I'm still waitin'!" Louie De Palma, "Taxi" "You think you're the first clown who ever woke up and said, 'I'm bored, I think I'll have a kid!'?" Dr. Larry Arbogast, Junior "You're insane, but you might also be brilliant." George Shapiro, Man on the Moon [Upon discovering he's eaten rabbits during a lycanthropic feeding:] "I see. That explains the indigestion." Amos Calloway, Big Fish "What are you talking about? Of course he's real. And by the way, sweetcheeks, I'm real too." Philoctetes, Hercules Write to Y.P.R. Write for Y.P.R. Right on, Y.P.R.