The difference between the right word and the almost-right word is the difference between the lightning bug and one of them firefly things.
It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and swallow a skeeter.
The coldest winter I ever spent was the summer I caught pneumonia and fell into the drink.
The human race has only one really effective weapon, and that is laughter induced by hurlin’ cod at shore-folk.
The man who doesn’t read good books has no advantage over the man who can’t read them—unless he’s some kinda magic witch.
Truth is stranger than the made-up junk.
Mark twain!
Chris Elzinga bides his time in San Francisco as an advertising copywriter. When not hawking wares, he enjoys drinking corn whiskey and punching at ghosts.
