Cucumber / chèvre / salmon roe canapés
“Fun Size” Salem Lights
Your band’s demo tape
The ol’ San Jose Shakedown
Photographs of themselves sleeping
Easter candy
Right-to-life pamphlets
Handmade coupons for a free back rub
Those peanut butter shit things in the black and orange wrappers
Kittens
Nathan Thornton lives, eats and sleeps in Columbus, Ohio, where he writes hilarious bios to accompany humor pieces, then shakes his head, reconsiders, and decides to play it straight. His work has appeared in a couple of other places, but he doesn’t like to make a big deal about it. And although he refers to himself in the third person, Nathan Thornton is me.
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8 Simple Rules for Dating My Daughter Who Is Estranged from Me
1. Don't hit her. Take it from me, that makes her super estrangey.
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