— Daily Garfield® Digest —

Looking a Gift Horse in the Mouth

The dimwitted dog tries the pull-my-finger routine on the mean, lazy cat. When pulled, instead of the unsurprising surprise burst of flatulence, the pup cha-chings like a cash-register drawer, offering something that looks like green candy canes hung on his tongue. Yech. Still, they say that a dog’s mouth has less bacteria than a human’s hands (if you believe that sort of frequently-repeated-without-citation bullshit presented as psuedofact). Anyway, green candy canes kind of suck.