— Dear Y.P.R. —

Marx and Engles to Spite

Today, I received an interesting present. Sitting on my piece of real estate in the biology lab was a hardcover edition of Ayn Rand’s Atlas Shrugged. I discovered the identity of the gift-giver (in German, gift means ‘poison’), a cold-bloodedly conservative succubus, and it would delight me to exchange the book in question, valued at $42ish, for a book which topically discusses the assassination of her hero, Mr. Bush. While I’m at it, I might pick up some Marx and Engels to spite her, and if I have any cash left over, I’ll see if there are any souls available at discount prices that I could wrap up and leave in her locker or something. It’d be cool if she’d use the soul, but I fear she’ll eat it, or else use its market value to buy more subversive books.

Devin Needler