I am Y.P.R.'s Boring Logo
blankspace.gif
Fun, Fickle Fiction (for Free!) Fact, Opinion, Essay, & Review Spectacular Features, Calendrical Happenings, Media Gadflies Poetry & Lyric Advice, How To, & Self-Help Listicles Semi-Frequent Columns Correspondence (Letters To and Letters From) Interviews The Book Club Letter from the Editors Disquieting Modern Trends Birthday Cards to Celebrities New & Noteworthy The Y.P.aRt Gallery Et Cetera, Et Cetera, Et Cetera The Y.P.aRchives Submit
syndicatebar.jpg

RSD | RSS I | RSS II
 Atøm | Spanish
supportbar.jpg Bea!   Creative Commons License
This journal is licensed under a Creative Commons License and powered by Movable Typo 4.01.
Crockpot!
© MMIII—MMVII,
Y.P.R. & Co.

The Journal of Literary Satire | Hastily Written & Slopilly Edited
Wednesday, April 14, 2004

Happy Birthday, Pete Rose!

Dear Pete,

First, you say you didn’t bet on baseball. Then, you say you bet on baseball but not your team. Now you say you bet on baseball but never against your team. I only have one question for you: Why not? Those were the only games over which you had any influence on the outcome. If you really wanted to win money, all you had to do was tank the games!

Jeez, I thought I was stupid.

Happy birthday.

Sincerely,
Geoff

 blankspace.gif