& Recently . . .

Dear Nesquik

Nestlé USA, Inc. Glendale, California 91203 Dear Nesquik (née Nestlé Quik), I’ve been drinking your chocolatey-flavored milk since before I was even born. Of all liquids on the planet, your chocolatey-flavored milk is my favorite, surpassing even soapy water, turpentine,…

St. Pat’s Facts

Hexadecimal Shades of Green #009900 Hunter #339900 Jade #33cc00 Kelly #339933 Emerald #66ff33 Lime #99ff99 Sea #99cc00 Pea #99ff00 Chartreuse #663300 Mean Joe Vital Stats for Kathy Ireland Height: 5’ 11” (1.80 m) Measurements: 34B-24-34 Shoe size: 8 Role in…

The Passion of the Führer

by Trevor Seigler

Critics are up in arms over Mel Gibson’s next film, declaring that the director’s anti-Semitic bias fuels his German-language epic, The Passion of the Führer. Gibson maintains that his picture, chronicling the last 12 hours in the life of the…

Sem Ordnilap Ytir Belec: Celebrity Palindromes

“Lisa Bonet ate no basil.” — Lenny Kravitz, summing up their last lunch date. ““Men, I’m Eminem!” — The rapper, upon entering prison. “Yes, sir—Romeo foe: Morrissey.” — The singer reaffirms his asexuality. “Damn! I, Agassi, miss again! Mad!” —…

Sem Ordnilap Ytir Belec: Celebrity Palindromes

“Lisa Bonet ate no basil.” — Lenny Kravitz, summing up their last lunch date. ““Men, I’m Eminem!” — The rapper, upon entering prison. “Yes, sir—Romeo foe: Morrissey.” — The singer reaffirms his asexuality. “Damn! I, Agassi, miss again! Mad!” —…

Polish Fact

Unofficial State Mottos
Bóg, Honor, Ojczyzna ("God, Honour, Fatherland")
Za wolność Waszą i Naszą ("For your freedom and ours")
Ojczyzna, Nauka, Cnota ("Fatherland, Education, Virtue")

Learn a Foreign Tongue!

Sprechen Sie Deutsch?
Holen Sie mir Ihr feinstes Fleisch und Käse.
Bring me your finest meats and cheeses.

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Friday, March 19, 2004   |    Fiction

Teenage Jesus

by Josh Abraham

Yes! Look at me, everybody, I did it again! Here, give me another glass of water. Ka-pow! Presto! Behold: one glass of Fresca. I’m awesome!





Josh Abraham was born in Algeria in 1913. He spent his early years in North Africa, working various jobs—in the weather bureau, in an automobile-accessory firm, in a shipping company—to help pay for his courses at the University of Algiers. As a young journalist, his report on the unhappy state of Muslims in the Kabylie region aroused the Algerian government to action and brought him public notice. From 1935 to 1938 he ran the Théâtre de l'Equipe, a theatrical company that produced plays by Malraux, Gide, Synge, and Dostoevski. During World War II he was one of the leading writers of the French Resistance and editor of Combat, then an important underground newspaper. Abraham's fiction, his philosophical essays, and his plays have assured his preëminent position in modern French letters. In 1957 Abraham was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature. His sudden death on January 4, 1960, cut short the career of one of the most important literary figures of the Western world when he was at the very summit of his powers. No, wait. That was Albert Camus.