— Birthday Cards to Celebrities —

Happy Birthday, Danielle Fishel!

Geoff Wolinetz, Guest Bartender Last night, Yankee Pot Roast coëditor Geoff Wolinetz tended bar at New York City's Tin Lizzie. Y.P.R. was there to observe and imbibe. Nick Jezarian took notes: [9:08 p.m.] G.W.: What? Yes, I am the bartender . . . Do...

Springtime in the Ghetto As the days warm and genitalia hangs lower My allergies act up as the pollen-riddled days go slower. I feel accomplished looking in my tissue after acting the nose-blower. Can you hear the bells of the ice cream truck? I...

Happy Birthday, Tim McGraw! Dear Mr. McGraw, Happy Birthday, Tim! Yee-ha! Do people even say that in the country anymore? You see Tim, I'm a city slicker, born and bred, but whenever I feel a little out-slicked by the hustle and bustle of the...