Tony Antoniadis
Tony Antoniadis very nearly sold a living room full of luxuriant, teal carpet to Louis Farrakhan. As usual, seam-placement was the deal-breaker. He has been published in McSweeney's and has a story about melancholy fire wardens appearing in Open City #20. He lives in Brooklyn.
How to Get a New York City Straphanger to Bankroll Your Alternative Lifestyle
So first you’ve got to get on the subway, sporting a tie-dyed T-shirt that warns, “It Ain’t Gonna Lick Itself.” 
Your Future in the Stars: Introducing the Department of Homeland Astrology
Aries You are one crazy diamond, Aries, and it’s not because the transit of Mars through your solar twelfth house has lasted over seven weeks. It’s because you think that fueling your Korean sedan with vegetable oil and living in...
How to Conduct a Sincere Discussion Group on Nicholson Baker’s Checkpoint with a Disruptive Norwegian Forest Cat on the Premises
In the spirit of the novel being discussed, arrange to meet in a hotel room in Washington D.C. Search the Internet for flight and hotel rates while playfully reciting Baker’s muscular dialogue and pretending to shoot your friends with...
How to Protest the Republican National Convention without Giving Up Your Last Weekend at Your Friend’s Timeshare on Fire Island
Find someone who seems approachable, then, over drinks, inform her that Bush’s tax cuts overwhelmingly favor the wealthy. If she seems responsive, quietly excuse yourself to hook up a Coldplay ballad on the jukebox.
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