Andrew Kiraly

Eleven Improbable but Nonetheless Real Baked Goods Listed in Descending Order of the Amount of Puerile Imagination Required to Make them Ripe with Sexual or Scatological Innuendo.

Tribal Elders, It Will Take More Than a Mere Car Alarm to Thwart Indiana Jones As we approach the hour of the Festival of the Great One, when we bow and offer sacrifice to He of the Moon and the Tides, I must speak openly and say it will take more than a mere car alarm to thwart Indiana Jones from stealing the golden image of our Most Supreme Tecuciztécatl,.

Drunken Comebacks I'll Remember to Say Next Time I'm Not So Drunk "Check your mouth's inbox. My fist has sent it an Evite."

What Various People Would Turn Into if, Subject to the Rules Established for the Care of Mogwai in the 1984 Movie Gremlins, They Were Fed after Midnight

My Recent Rejection Slips, Rendered in the Same Manner in which Movie Advertisements Selectively Quote Reviews "YOUR STORY DID ... MEET OUR STANDARDS..." —American Literary Review
"IT DOES ... MEET OUR EDITORIAL NEEDS ..." —Redivider
"... WE ENCOURAGE YOU ..." —Carolina Quarterly ...

A Glimpse into the Troubled Stream of Consciousness of Henry Purvis, 37, Also Known in World of Warcraft as Torvak Redhammer, 67th-Level Warrior Dwarf You consume a Half-Full Can of Dr. Pepper to restore 4 Hit Points.
You scratch Crotch of Disuse.
You equip Jeans of Girth.
You equip T-shirt of Yesterday +1 ...

The Secret Keyboard Shortcuts of Tuesdays with Morrie Author Mitch Albom F5: Earnestness checker
Ctrl- +: increases pathos
Ctrl- -: decreases pathos
Alt-H: Renders highlighted passage in veil of gentle yet poignant humor ...

Ad Script for Masterpiece Theatre: The Game First-Person Shooter for the Xbox 360 GRAPHIC: Fly-over of game's 3D-rendered British countryside. Hills give way to valleys, rivers to glens. View settles on bustling 18th-century English town. Rock guitar riff ...

Design Notes for the Richard Ford "Existence Period" Roller Coaster in Haddam, New Jersey With the dignity of a man who has become adept at the art of camouflaging the deeper scars of life's skirmishes, a passenger of a range mass of 40 kg–120 kg will enter the car that resembles a fire-wreathed, smoke-snorting...